Doctor, I Feel Your Pain.
This year, we switched from a Medicare supplement plan to a Medicare Advantage PPO. And we will have saved thousands of dollars in medical, pharmaceutical, and related health bills this year alone. As part of their medical management program, the insurer provides each...
Growing Up In Brooklyn
Most of you have been wondering why I act the way I do. And the rest of you are just too polite to ask. It’s not easy growing up in an Italian immigrant family that strongly preferred beer over wine. I never recovered from the first glass. I still can’t drink the...
Invasion of the Love Bugs
It's May and love is in the air! Actually, it's love bugs. And this year, the annual invasion has arrived with a vengeance. These innocuously named creatures seem to have no beneficial purpose in life. They look like fireflies, but instead of glowing in the dark, they...
Driving While Jewish
Every year after moving to Florida, my good friend Tom threw a St. Patrick’s Day party. And his tradition was that each attendee tell an Irish joke. Tom took the joke telling seriously and had a team of judges announce the winner at the end of each party. He also had...
The Shopping Gene
One of the reasons our marriage works so well is that we have different skill sets that complement each other. For example, I can make instant decisions and buy something on the spot. Whereas Sara will shop in 27 countries and find the best price on the same item,...
The Acceptance Speech
Ladies and Gentlemen, welcome to the First Annual Dinner of Crossing Guards United. And now that the dining portion of the evening is over, we come to the moment you have all been waiting for – the announcement of the Crossing Guard of the Year. It’s my honor to...
The Five-Star Motel From Hell
With the car packed, we began our two-day trek from Sarasota to Ramsey, NJ. Unfortunately, after a delayed start, we left at 11 am. Driving 18 hours on I95 can only be described as boring. So, we look to play mindless games to occupy our minds. On this trip, we...
Traffic Congestion Unraveled
Whenever we travel the I95 corridor through the Middle-Atlantic states, we try to factor in the timing of our drive through Washington, DC. Gridlock in Congress pales to gridlock on the roads around this terribly overcrowded city. I once drove all the way to a hotel...
Happy Hour at Whole Foods
Across the street from the very successful Fresh Market on University Parkway sat a tract of land that was undeveloped due to its ‘Wetlands’ designation. This full-featured swamp was the home of a multitude of endangered, mud-loving creatures. Here you could find...
The City of Lights
We went to Paris by rail, leaving from Bordeaux. The high speed train blew into the Paris station traveling at 175 mph, with the countryside whizzing by us. And that was the last time we experienced speed in any manner. The streets were gridlocked, the sidewalks...